Pretty messed up, again

I don't understand myself. I feel alone, like no one understands me, like no one will ever love me, but I still don't want to change. Why? Because this is me. Whether people like it or not. I was born this way. This is who I am. I actually like to be me. I don't like myself but I wouldn't want to be anyone but me. I am shy, insecure, sometimes childish and selfish, weird, bipolar, crazy and confused. But I still wouldn't want to exchange lifes with nobody. My mom, my bff, my future bro/sis, my stepfather, my other friends, my life. They're mine. No matter how much life sucks right now, nothing lasts forever. Not even bad things. I have faith in that someday I'll get somewhere and feel I belong in that place. I don't know if I'm making sense, but until that moment all I can do is keep on living, or just existing.